Pregame @ Detroit

Sigh.

Sorry.

I knew if I turned on the TV tonight, the Pens would be doomed. And what a hell of a way to lose the game, as it turned out.

Well, good for Detroit for just dominating these playoffs. That said, in the grand pantheon of Flames gone by, Gary Roberts >>>>>> (Stuart + McCarty).

Think about that.

Brad Stuart has a Cup ring.

I don't do mornings

...so this is the only way to put up a pre-game.

Ohhhh. The all-important divisional game. This one in particular is a huge one, since should we win and not give up any pity points, we'll be back atop the NW Division. Again.

I haven't been paying much attention to Minnesota this year, but they're on a slight skid, having lost the last two in a row, for reasons (honestly) unknown to me. Check out what Kirsten has to say, maybe. Ignore the Iggy hate, do.

We're building on some good momentum from the latter three games this week. I don't actually think it's a big deal whether Kipper bags a shutout or not, but it was nice for him to finally get that out of the way (besides saving my bacon in a couple of fantasy leagues). I really enjoyed the physical play they put forth against Detroit, though I could have done without Owen Nolan-the-bonehead.

Speaking of boneheaded, that Phaneuf hit on Kopecky looked pretty dangerous, though not intentionally malicious (I don't expect Dion to have a camera in his ass to notice Kopecky's helmet is off). From our experience with various Detroit fans from last year's playoffs, I have no doubt they will join their Edmontonian brethren in labeling Phaneuf a headhunting caveman who relishes small children, kittens, and fuzzy baby seals as his Sunday brunch entree. Whatever. He's OUR caveman.

What little we saw of Vandermeer looked fine, though (as expected) not stellar. Obviously opposing teams will push on him pretty hard until it's obvious he's used to the new team and the new system. Definitely an improvement on Eriksson, and no worse than last year's late pickup of David Hale.

I just want to say one more word about Alex Tanguay. Namely, BOOYEAH. Kudos to him for if not ignoring all the tedious trade talk, all but daring the Flames to trade him. I've pretty much been ignoring all mutterings about Tanguay, because even if it makes sense in a cap world, we don't get that far in the playoffs without him. And TSN and half of Montreal want us to trade him for spare parts? No way in hell.

So! It will be a Flames win, but afternoon games are pretty screwed up, so either the score is way high, or it's next to nil.

Staggering back in the saddle

Uhhhh...so where were we?

I've spent a week without watching the Flames or even following along on radio. I feel dirty.

(By the way, should any of you happen into Cookstown, Ontario, there is an outlet mall there containing a Reebook outlet which is selling pre-RBK Edge-era jerseys for half price. I'm just saying.)

The Flames should be feeling pretty dirty too, after that road trip. Squinting at the scores, it looks like they at least cleaned up their act in time to made Gretzky throw a hissy fit (I am really choked I missed that), and to continue to play strong against their Texan nemesis.

And Detroit... this month just isn't getting any easier. On the plus side, the Wings are pretty injured and will be missing Lidstrom a lot. On the minus side...these are the Wings. Can't ever take them (or say, other teams, like, LA...) for granted.

I'm going to need some time to get back in the swing of things, so this is staying short. Flames win in a squeaker, while I rummage about to see how Dave has kept you all entertained.

Dave?
Dave?
Oh, nevermind.

Broken Face + Kool Krys Kolanos + JFJ a Mistake + Deetroyit

According to TSN.ca, Kurtis Foster of the Wild has a "broken face". That's perhaps one of the more bizarre injury descriptions I've seen. Maybe a bit insulting as well, at least if it were applied to Ricci or Smyth. He'll only be out 3 to 5 days, so apparently it's just a minor break in his face.

---

In one of these awesome 2 degrees of separation examples, Krys Kolanos has been playing a damn fine game in Quad-Cities for the baby Flames. 6 points in 6 games since he joined the team. He was my brother's friend's friend from school back in Calgary. A 1st round draft pick of the Phoenix Coyotes, he had a decent rookie year in the NHL before injuries set him back. He attended the Flames training camp this year, and states he'd love to play for his hometown team, but was sent to Q-C -- which he promptly didn't report to, reportedly over salary issues. Sutter recently called him up, worked something out, and presto-changeo he's on an AHL contract and doing decently there. If he keeps this up, I reckon it won't be too long til he lands a contract with the big boys.

---

Shock and Awe: Hiring JFJ was a mistake. But a mistake the Leafs will apparently stand by until he makes a huge mistake*.

* (Huge mistake is defined as a monstrous mistake more massive than signing McCabe on his long-term, huge-salary, no-trade, no-movement contract)

---

Flames play Detroit tonight at the Joe. Brings back bad memories of last year's playoff run, every time we play there. My brother and I made the pilgrimage all the way to the land of Ford (which, if memory serves, was about a 40 hour drive from Toronto when you include the lineup at the border and the way time stands still in Windsor). The locals were enamored with the beauty of the new stainless steel urinal troughs they had installed at one of the two (I think there's only two!) bathrooms in the entire place.

Will Phaneuf start as LW again? No, probably not. That was pretty funny though. Nice work, Keenan.
Will the Flames win? No, probably not. Detroit's a great team right now and the Flames are wishy-washy flippy-floppy.
Will the Flames score a goal? I'm going to go out on a limb here and predict Yes. At least one. Probably with Iginla getting a point.
Will Kiprusoff have a great game? I'm thinking yes, yes he is. He did well against Detroit in the playoffs, anyway. Besides, there's no talented players on that team, right? Just some no-name Swede who probably wishes he played on a talented team like Vancouver or Phoenix.

Go Flames!

Er, yes, we ARE alive....

It's the first intermission, we're down 2-1, and yes... we have been paying attention. Datsyuk and Zetterberg, sigh, what else can you say, really? At least it's a close-ish game.

Though... it's November! Which means it's time to deliver an update for the Open Ice Fantasy Hockey League. Remember, this is the rotisserie league Dave set up at the beginning of the season.

If I don't post the standings, they'll never appear, since Dave is currently languishing at the bottom... so, without further ado, let me present the standings for the Open Ice Fantasy Hockey League, as of November 1 (not including tonight's stats, of course):

1. The Hopelesses (MG)
   
2. Woolly Brained (me!)
3. The Pant Weasels (Dave's brother. Hey there!)
4. Flaming C (I'm sorry, I don't actually know who you are, except your name is Paul-Marc on Yahoo. If you'd like to fill us in, go ahead...)
5. Craig Conroys (Duncan)
6. Completely Hammered (who else but ST?)
7. The Pantless Pirates (DAVE!)
   

Pre-Game: Calgary @ Detroit

Tonight, in The Joe, the Flames will the Wings. A rematch, I guess. I must confess that I haven't yet watched a full Flames game this season. First my excuse was I'm out in Toronto where I couldn't find the pre-season games on TV. Now, my excuse is I'm too busy. In reality, I just do not like watching teams that aren't ready for prime time. Historically, October Flames are not ready.

All I know is what I've seen on the scoresheets (tangent: I loathe the new scoresheet -- where's my goalie stats? -- need two sheets for the same information now...). Also, the collective views of the blogosphere.

While the Flames haven't been blown out 7-1 or anything like that, I'm not convinced that they're playing to win so much as they're playing to impress Keenan. A lot of overly fancy plays and simple bungles with the puck cost several games. I'm hopeful that during the few days they've had off, they've gone back to basics (and maybe -- please -- worked on the powerplay), but only time will tell.

I'm still tentative about this team, but the pieces are certainly all there for a contender. I think if there's any coach out there that can break the bad habits Nervous Jimmy gave this team, it's a hardass like Keenan. But it takes time (hopefully not too much).

The Flames need a win against a good team to inspire confidence and get the ball rolling. Tonight might just be the night.

Fore!

I'll do a more detailed post-mortem later this week... just let me take care of some stuff I've been neglecting in my life first.

P.S. Now will you guys get out there and scoop up some Hitmen tickets already, dammit?

Washing my hands

Well. It's been an interesting day or so, hasn't it?

As a hockey fan, it's been hugely entertaining as a playoff series to observe the ups and downs of the series.

As a Flames fan, it's kind of sucked, for obvious reasons. I hang out with more than enough people whose teams never made the playoffs to not appreciate our post-season run. But it hasn't been good. I'm more disappointed with yesterday's game on account of it feeling like one of those games which Playfair has had no control over. They've occurred quite often this season, sadly. Dude might not even be able to buy new suits over the summer... or have anywhere to wear them.

As a Flames blogger, I'm tired of this shit. I don't mind the groupthink so much, because honestly, it was really comforting to be able to hop online and bitch about the game, and not have to watch the gong show which was the third.

I am tired of reading my faves in the Flames blogosphere, and watching anonymice pour up out of the woodwork and readers who've been reading us for all of the last two weeks flood these guys with smug assertions about "at least our team is way more classy than that." Than what? It's the playoffs. Nobody is going to play with kid gloves on, and if the Wings can't play that game either, then maybe they should stay on the bench, and let the Wheel of Justice play for them.

It's a war of attrition. If it weren't, Holmstrom wouldn't have planted his ass in Kipper's face, there wouldn't be random grabbing and slashing by just about every player on the ice, Hasek wouldn't be trying for a Razzie. Last team standing wins, and if you don't plan on being standing at the end, then at least make the other guys fight for every inch they take.

On that level, I have no issues with what happened in the third period last night. I'm perhaps embarrassed that it got to that, rather than taking it to the Wings in terms of well, actually playing hockey. But I have no issues with the Calgary Flames having to make a statement about whether they want to be in the playoffs or not. (I think they said, Maybe. Which is a bit late. Oh well.)

Good sportsmanship? Is that what you show when your team wins the game anyways, and you still complain to our team's fans that their team was too dirty? Ad nauseam?

And hearing from these near-strangers that that our captain is not captain material? Have they done their homework at all? Isn't coming here basically what their homework should be? Have they been orbiting Uranus for the last five years? Just what do they know about Jarome Iginla?

I've watched this guy since we got Jarome Who? for Joe Who?, since we plopped him into our last playoff series of the 90s, and there is no better captain in the league. You haven't watched him patiently take time out of his personal life to chat to fans. You haven't watched him eschew most of the pre-game warmup to sign autographs for kids who have no greater hero. You haven't heard him stay positive and answer the same question over and over again cheerfully for every single dumbass reporter he has to talk to (and oh, god, that zillion-watt smile).

You haven't watched him blossom into a force for Canada in international play, and fucking pick up the Calgary Flames, and carry them where they need to go when it's time to go. And sure, I've watched him do that all too often. There is no one else currently playing I'd rather have captain the Flames, and anybody who thinks he doesn't deserve that honour is a fool. Rather, all too often, that honour doesn't deserve Jarome Iginla.

It's somewhat a bleak outlook for the Flames these playoffs admittedly. But when this series at least is over, Iggy will still be our captain and the heart of the team, and at least there'll be some peace and quiet around here. And amen to that.

There is a line, and it has been crossed.

Ladies and gentlemen, today's game was beyond embarrassing. The play is bad enough -- it was just bad hockey. But towards the end of the game, when it descended into goonery, thuggary, and downright unsportsmanlike behaviour, I was completely ashamed of my team.

Langkow's undercut...
McLennan's slash...
Iginla's butt-end...

Shame on you guys, because you have shamed us all.

As far as I'm concerned, the post-season is now over. Sutter has a lot of work to do, and I'm starting to lose my patience with him, too. He should have had the balls and the smarts to dismiss Playfair long ago before we even got to this place. No post would be acceptable without a shot to Playfair, but of course I blame him for this as well. He should've been fired a long, long time ago. The man has no spine, no intelligence, and no career in this league.

I will see you all in 07-08, hopefully on a better note.

Game 5: That will be all.

Mid-Game Ranting

Mr. Playfair: Why is Amonte getting so much PowerPlay time?

Mr. Iginla: Step it up...

Mr. Phaneuf: Just sit down for the rest of the second period.

Mr. Cleary: Karma's a bitch...

Calgary-Detroit Game 4 Post-Game

We won! So I am a bit happy. We're now down to a 3-game series. Tomorrow's game, like all Playoff games but just a bit more...is huge. I'm already incredibly nervous and twitchy, and the high of the victory last night is wearing off as doubt and second-guessing.

I'm thinking mostly of how Detroit dominated at home, and Calgary "squeaked out" two wins at home. I'm hoping Calgary can sustain this momentum, but to be honest I'm not very confident. There's really not much else to say but stay physical team, and stay awesome Kipper!

On a related note, I've heard that the Red Wings are once again asking fans to wear red to tomorrow's games. I don't understand why they would do that again. It hadn't worked in games 1 and 2, and then they counteracted the effect by handing out white towels. Most of the fans jerseys are also white, so do they not want people to wear Red Wings jerseys and instead wear generic red shirts they may have?

It's just a half-baked idea. They can't compete with the C of Red, so why try? It just makes the organization look desperate, with a tinge of being pathetic. Just give it up, Detroit, you aren't hockeytown any more...we all know it, and you can't convince me otherwise.

PS: Props to Leanne for a mad-crazy liveblog last night. You are a trooper!

Detroit Liveblog: Playoff edition

Well...dunno when another liveblog will happen. Times like playoffs, I miss having a laptop...thanks for hanging out as always. It will be done again!

Sometimes I wonder who will lose their voice/black out first, Peter Maher, or Beasley the PA guy.

12:08 AM: Ahhh. They're playing Johnny Cash in the rink where he belongs.

Awesome.

12:07 AM: AND....YOU CAN PUT IT IN THE WIN COLUMN!

12:06 AM: Iggy! That's the most exciting play in hockey! You can't miss that! Especially when Hasek coughs it up like that!

12:05 AM: There you go. Now my pulse is accelerating. 1:45 left to go...

12:04 AM: Icing the puck repeatedly with 3 mins left in the game is going to make for a long night.

12:01 AM: Ok, actually... can I rant about the kind of pressure Detroit's putting on us? Why does this have to be all Kipper?

12:00 AM: Kipper. He is the man. I have (I suspect) little to do tonight besides worship the goaltender.

11:57 PM: Bit of a scrum. I'm really hoping Draper will go off for something. Like, (borrowing HG's word of the night) for being an asshat.

11:55 PM: Goddamn. Longest PK ever. Kipper, you're a god. Friesen...you're forgiven for that penalty at the start of the period.

ALL HAIL KIPPER!

11:54 PM: Yelle's been so crazy good today. Good work on the PK so far, guys...

Isn't this so much better than this time last week?

11:52 PM: Oh, Rhett. Good call in taking the penalty, but you want a time out, just go back to the dressing room to get stitched up again, eh?

11:50 PM: It occurs to me that I've been doing this for two hours, and I haven't screamed at my computer once. What is it about TV that's so stressful?

11:47 PM: Juice! You're alive! Now, I hope the next one doesn't go off the post.

11:45 PM: Ooo...another PP (drawn this time by crazygood Lombo)? Zyuzin gets a shot at the goal? What's next?

11:43 PM: Langkow tries for the boot trick. Gworgeous setup from Iggy. No dice. Awwwww...

11:40 PM: A boring period wouldn't be that horrible a thing for us. Yawwwwwn. Can I just say that my commentators are better at telling me what's happening than yours are? Screw all that moving-picture business.

11:37 PM: Mostly all Wings this period...but wait, Amonte steals the puck? And Lebda is back, I see. Wait, I can't see anything...

11:35 PM: Stuart's had another good game, I think. We're not missing Regehr nearly as much as I feared we might, overall.

11:34 PM: Susan? Did you make a play to clear the puck? And it worked?

11:32 PM: I make incoherent gibbering noises. I know Detroit's PP isn't strong this series, but let's not throw them any frickin' bones, eh?

11:31 PM: Oh, Friesen. It's been a while since you were a dumbass. Not a good way to start the third...

11:30 PM: Here we go... finish strong, guys! (Peter Maher just pimped Intellibed, for those of you keeping score on the advertising front. Remember when we talked aobut his sideline as a mattress salesman?)

11:23 PM: Well. They're not stumping the Schwab in the intermission interview. He thinks hockey is all about "what have you done for me lately?" He's probably got a point...

11:16 PM: Nobody on the team has a "personal services" contract Gretzky style, do they? 'Cause I just had the thought that maybe they were threatened with having to do the dishes at Flames Central 'till playoffs are over if they didn't shape the hell up...

11:12 PM: Buzz

11:07 PM: FORTHELOVEOFGOD CLEARTHEDAMNPUCK

11:06 PM: Lebda heads to the dressing room? Let's see if they can come back for the rest of the game the way our guys can...

11:04 PM: Oh, Iggy. The radio guys thought it was going to Chelios. Tricky man.

11:03 PM: Our PP starts. Langkow... come on... please?

11:02 PM: What did I tell you about Yelle? Didn't I say something like Who lets him go on breakaways? already tonight? And he draws a penalty. Good man.

11:00 PM: We're on the PK. Dangerous. Yelle's had a strong period though. So underappreciated, is ol' Sandbox.

10:57 PM: Peter Maher's put Langkow on Boot Trick alert. I guess Alberta Boot hasn't been giving too many pairs away.

Shit, did I just crash Blogger?

10:54 PM: "Third lead of the game." Just hearing that makes me giddy.

10:53 PM: Has anybody besides Hammer gone after Cleary yet?

10:51 PM: DAYYYYYYYYYYYYYMOND LANNNNNNGGGGGGKOW! Hot stuff. Glad he and Tangs came to play today.

10:50 PM: Another 5-3 caused by Iggy. And colour me biased, but Lidstrom's been not his usual self tonight.

The Doomsday chips are heating things up. I just popped a window open. Just to get cooler.

10:48 PM: Enjoying Steady Eddy, kids, huh?? We're going on the PP, btw. Thanks to Robert Lang, and Baywest Homes, and the Power of the Red Pen.

10:44 PM: Flames need to come back out of the dressing room.

10:40 PM: Kipper is stepping up so far. I think. I was on the phone. Poll: Do I let Dave take over during the third and hop in my car and drive five minutes away to somebody with time-splitting?

10:38 PM: Apparently Maher isn't immune to broadcastitis. We had Same-uelsson for a bit.

10:37 PM: Detroit comes out hard. Iggy hits back. But it's Huselius with the penalty. Sorry Dave, I liked him better when he was being invisible.

10:34 PM: Here we go again...

10:29 PM: I've just uncorked my doomsday device. That's right, Old Dutch chips. The jalapeno cheese kettle chips. You got nothin' on the chips, Detroit.

(Note to people outside of Ontario. They finally started selling them here. You wouldn't understand what it's like...

10:17 PM: Buzz. Well...a strong start for us. Unfortunately also a strong one by Bertuzzi. Damn him.

10:12 PM: As a calibration point, the crowd noise really hasn't changed despite who's scored more recently. It's just always really fucking loud. Good for them. Now if we can convince some of these guys to pick up some Hitmen tix too...

The radio guys lecture on the importance of winning faceoffs. Heed their wisdom.

Thanks, Dave

10:10 PM: Oh, boourns. Somebody hit Bertuzzi harder. Yes, Phaneuf, I'm looking at you.

10:08 PM: Ok... can we step up the play after we score? It makes me nervous when they come back strong after we pot one.

10:06 PM: Oh, the sweet sweet sounds of goalies being heckled.

10:04 PM, II: Conroy! About time you got something for your work up there. Woot!

10:04 PM: Hmm. Who let the Wings wake up? That high-altitude air plus the late gametime was supposed to make them more drowsy than me, at work just after lunch.

10:00 PM: Oh! New commercial on the radio. Though washable leather shoes sounds like ... vaguely infomerical-type material.

Oh, boourns. Bertuzzi? You're kidding me.

9:57 PM: Is it bad of me to get the giggles whenever Yelle runs into the offensive zone with the puck? Or Nilson? But good pressure there. What are the Wings doing, letting them get chances? But who cares... just do it more!

9:54 PM: I grow impati...

WHOO!

The big line finally acts their size.

9:50 PM: Oho! Is that a 5-on-3 Iggy drew? Shwwweeeet. I'm told that it could have been offsetting penalties, but let's hope this is the beginning of Hasek going off his rocker.

9:47 PM: PP. Let's do 'er.

9:46 PM: Awright! I expect this to be the night of people finally showing up, dammit! That's you, Conroy, and you, Tanguay, and you, Huselius, and you, Moss.

9:45 PM: Not a fantastic PK, but we're hanging in there. Don't make me regret writing that.

9:43 PM: Well. That was quick. At least we held off with the penalties a bit longer than when in the Joe, eh? Oh, Davey.

What I said last time about the crowd. Damn you, CBC! So far I haven't had to worry about Regehr still being out. Phaneuf and Warrener are back in.

9:40 PM: Puck drops. Booyeah!

9:33 PM: I receive the first complaint of the night about Drew. Also, what is the deal with all the bloggers getting tickets to the game? At least I won't be competing for liveblog attention with BofA's Fenwick tonight.

9:31 PM: Laughing my ass off at HG's vid...jitters, jitters, jitters. Wondering how my boys are doing with that chick flick they opted to go for instead of internet radio happiness with me.

My tax dollars are apparently not supporting a broadcast of the Calgary-Detroit game on cable where I live....so what better time to trot out the liveblog???

(People who remember the last one will know I'm doing this using internet radio from the Fan960, chilling with my favourite Flames broadcasters ever. So. No IMing about stuff related to the game till after I post snarky comments about it.)

And without further ado: Just. Bring. It.

This is the Dawning of the Age of Huselius

I really wanted to use that headline when Huselius kicked ass in the playoffs. I'm still waiting, Juice! Time to kick it up a few notches! BAM! And all that. Dazzle me with your squirmy miracle working, this is a good game to do it.

For if the Flames lose this one, it's all over. It's a big, big game that, apparently, many people will not get to watch in favour of the most exciting playoff series to date -- Vancouver vs Dallas. Yippie. Regehr will have a great seat in the press box, which does concern me, but I'm really glad Giordano can stay on the team as well.

What needs to be done to pick up the W? The usual...

• Very strong, very tough, very crash-crash-bang-bangy physical play.
• Ability to actually clear the zone when needed.
• Stay out of the box! But stay physical! They're not mutually exclusive, Playfair...
• Intimidate the De-troy-it players with a thunderous audience that actually cares enough about the team to wear jerseys (suck it, "Hockeytown", you are impostors!)
• Taunting Hasek repeatedly with awful taunts (eg, "Hasek! Why don't you make like your country and split!")
• Scoring is a plus.
• Keeping the puck out of our own net is plus-plus.
• Kipper, stay strong, brother!

Bring it! The best part of the awful start in this series is my lowered expectations. I've nowhere to go but up, and damnit, I wanna get hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh on this team. Upwards and away, my children! Play like you mean it!

The Sixth Man

We knew this was going to happen, right?

The boys would come home, they would be confronted by a lot of finger-pointing and dark mutterings, they would be uptight for a bit. Then, gametime would hit, they would be showed up by the anthem singer (can you believe she's back at work, what, just a few weeks after popping out a baby?), and then the crowd in the Saddledome would take over.

I love the intensity of that crowd. I love it when they're on. And it sucks knowing I mostly can't be a part of that crowd, living on the other side of the country as I do. And I've come to believe it's the home crowd which focuses these guys and makes them ready to kick some butt. See, the guys can give up on each other when they're the Evil Twins and embarrassing themselves on the road. But the crowd at home won't let them give up. They won't let the Flames roll over once they're down by a goal. And the Flames use that energy to their advantage. And who could blame them?

Oh, right! They played hockey too!

Kudos to a lot of guys for finally stepping up. Stuart played strong most of the night, despite one egregious giveaway at the end of the game. Warrener and Phaneuf both took injuries which, in the regular season, probably would have been game-ending. But screw that, they came back to play anyways. Iggy finally capitalized on mistakes the other side was making. But the guy who really stepped it up this game was Mark Giordano. (Not that I'm saying anything original. It's been all over the blogosphere already, and before the series started too...)

Was it a perfect game? Hardly. There's still a lot of flaws - times when we're too tentative in Detroit's zone, times when we still suck in the defensive zone. But we got a lead, we won back the lead, and we kept the lead till the end of the game. And right now, I'll take it.

It's a step in the right direction, and it's a better game than we've seen from these guys for the better part of the last three weeks. I still have a little bouncy ball in my stomach. It'll rattle around a bit less if we tie it up tomorrow.

Detroit: Game 3: A Preview

10:00pm Eastern, 8:00pm Mountain...

Playfair looks to be coach for the rest of the season. It's not too surprising, Sutter seems to like to stick to his guns. He rarely pulls goaltenders, too.

As far as I can tell, it's somewhat of a nothing game. The Flames can absolutely dominate the next two games and I'll still be mopey and not impressed. I'm currently at a stage where I'm trying to evaluate a new team to cheer for for the duration of the playoffs. Right now, it has to be Dallas...if only because of their opponent.

My prediction?
4-3 Flames...while still being outshot.

Go, Hitmen, Go!

Third round, onwards!


BTW... Calgary's pro club...what're they called again? Fir...yes, fire the coach...but team name... anyways. They could take a hint from these kids.

That was stunning

I woke up at the crack of dawn today, spent $125 on playoff tickets, and drove 4 hours through the shadiest Canadian cities (Windsor) and its plethora of strip clubs only to arrive in Detroit.

What a culture shock for me. The first sight a visitor from Canada is greeted with is a hollowed-out shell of a building that you can actually see through.
In a brilliant act of foreshadowing, I took an image of that building. It would later become a perfect analogy for the Flames team that decided to show up only by their physical presence in the state.

The Joe Louis Arena -- like today -- is one unexpectedly ugly mofo. It's incredibly poorly designed. And ugly. Here's one of the walkways leading to the arena. It's a 1960s spaceage-era, accented with ribbed concrete. Nice.
It was poorly organized, to say the least. Canadian customers can only pick up their tickets from Will Call. Them and about 10,000 other people...we arrived 30 minutes before the game (we would've been there 1.5 hours before, had US Customs not been incredibly inept...but that's another story). We were greeted with an incredible Will Call lineup that stretches from the Joe Louis entrance, all along the right side, and to the middle of the back. Wow...

We finally made it to our seats. Amazingly, there were lots of empty seats available all game. This was not a sell out. The atmosphere is not even close to as electric or exciting as a home Flames playoff game. Most fans aren't even wearing jerseys. Free red shirts were given out to many people, and free white towels were given to everyone to make them part of the "red wave". Think of it as a pathetic "Calgary-meets-Vancouver" ripoff festival that didn't really work out. "Posers" is the first word that comes to mind.

Did I ever tell you that Calgary's scoreboard completely owns their pathetic, ghetto scoreboard? Yeah, let's just focus on that for a bit...

Speaking of ghetto, the entire arena is ghetto. Not as bad as the Detroit Tigers stadium right near by, which is visibly rusting and needs a paint job, but still bad. The design itself is terrible -- there is but one concourse for the entire arena. After the 1st period, I waited in line for 25 minutes to use the urinal and there was still a massive line behind me. It was unreal, I've never seen anything like it before in an arena. The middle-aged gentlemen behind me in line were, rather seriously, discussing how nice the new stainless steal troughs were at this particular restroom. They're stainless! Seriously! Apparently this is a luxury in Detroit...

The only positive of this game? Kipper! He was awesome today.

The rest of the team? Well. Well...Well.... I've been so infuriated today by it I will succinctly summarize what happened in the game:
Period 1: HAHAHAHAHAHA / WTF / ARGH
Period 2: Where the hell were you guys hiding?
Period 3: HAHAHAHAHAHA / Screw this, I'm bailing early to beat the border traffic

By the way, Bob McKenzie is jumping on the Fire Playfair bandwagon that I unofficially started in November. He says fire Playfair before Game 3. I cannot agree more.

Happy thoughts!

You're laughing already, aren't you? They laughed at me when I blithely assured everyone that the Flames were going ALL THE WAY after eight years without making the playoffs.

I got the last laugh.

I've savoured the taste of my own bile once this year already and have no intention of doing so again, despite the steaming pool of vomit which was the game last night.

My first instinct is always to be a bit protective of the team after a stinker like that. After last night, I needed some cooling-off time for that particular instinct to set in, but it's woken up again.

I see that game as a wasted opportunity, not a pre-cursor to a blown playoff run. I still find it difficult to believe that they might be swept, simply because I don't believe the Evil Twins can stay out in the open four games in a row, especially with two at home. And if the Evil Twins wanted to come out and play, at least they did so in style. Go big or go home!

The near-total failure of the team yesterday I blame (as has pretty much everybody I've talked to who's seen more than five minutes of that game) on the coaching. There were just too many individual failures, unless perhaps Iggy's flu has moved onwards to the entire team. (If so, then our chances are pretty much shot, I'll admit that, but what are they doing on the plane? Playing Spin the Bottle?)

I'm not going to harp on it anymore. We've been talking about it for months on this blog, and elsewhere in the Flames blogosphere. However, at this point, we have to be realistic. Fatalistically, what we got is what we're stuck with, bad fashion and all. Sucks, but whatcha gonna do?

And I'm going to invoke the ghost of Flames coaches past (especially because of the high disdain with which we've held the current incumbent this year), specifically ol' Badger Bob (the only one of them who could be a ghost, really).

"We've got them where we want them!"

Anybody else remember that ol' chestnut?

Anyone?

You guys should really look that up.

And it could be very well true, too. Really, it's a small wonder so many of the Detroit press and blogosphere have quickly concluded it's gonna be real fast from here - recall that our last game there was a stinker too (one where they were recovering from a trade that shook us all, and where I was recovering from having puked repeatedly into a snowbank. Among other places. Sorry 'bout that, Dave.)

I've taken a certain amount of perverse pleasure in the unrelenting dismissal of Calgary as a contender as the aftermath of last night's game. I don't think it's a bad thing to have happened. With our expectations all a bit lower today than they were Thursday morning, the pressure really is off. At the beginning of yesterday's game, I wanted them to splatter Detroit like an octopus tossed on the ice... by the end of the second period I just wanted them to pot one goal.

And over the last day, I've fallen back into a frame of mind where I can just shrug and let it go, and think appallingly optimistic do-I-not-realize-what-just-went-down thoughts. Things like, So what? We just win four of the next six now. Meh. And Well, at least the guys are all rested! And They were stirring things up in the third...

Anyways, kids, happy thoughts! Lots of hockey left.

Also, can I point out the example of Calgary's other hockey team? They came home early this week down 0-2 in the second round of their playoffs. They evened things out with 8-1 and 5-1 victories, and just tonight, they took the lead in the series with a 5-4 win.

Playoffs, man. Anything can happen. And does.